Posts Tagged ‘belief’

In the previous days before getting here, there was no heightened feelings, rapid blinks, bloated head and fast paced pulses. I was completely light, flexible and free.

Now I am in this confined space where I gasp for air and yearn for the open space, light, polluted domes, synthetic hearts, and dusty atmosphere.

I need something that someone can give but someone else has, it is unfair yet fair; the latter being her and the former being me. If it were a reverse I would still be engulfed by this cocoon of discomfort because I would cause a rift that could have been avoided if I had tampered with my oestrogen levels.

This time of my journey in a world that seems realistic yet unrealistic-never mind…sometimes I have the tendency to be nihilistic but then I do believe in the Creator so I wouldn’t let that nature take the greater part of me thereby causing Him to cut the tight thread I am fighting so hard to hold on to- is so hard to avoid, I cannot possibly commit the cowardly act of running away?

I need to stay and fight, break through, tear down, plant explosive devices and clean up the carcass that will be my blood machine.

Such deceit that my intricate organ plays on itself. Such a pity that it is in my cranium and the other that decides to act the fool probably because it is suffocated by layers of pigment, fat, cartilage, bone or tied down by a network of long thin tubes.

They never let my decisions be the final word instead, they bounce and thrust, shove and burst until the ache comes causing my pores to expand and water, making me see little round circular rainbows, turning my optical vision into a microscope, even worse in sleep it is open and sees more images from my organ, such trickery that is mastered it does succeed in making me give in to irrational thoughts often deluding myself of reality. It pushes, the fool pushes, such painful jabs to my chest, it does not like to be ignored but I prefer deceit not foolishness so endurance might take the place of my name.

I had no idea that there was another enemy that crossed all negative adjectives and became smart, it is often underestimated and because of this it is given time to develop and concoct a series of curved and straight lines.

It makes allies with the pharynx and epiglottis then attacks in such a way that is rather invisible but later becomes so transparent giving its victim a tendency for insanity, suicidal thoughts and a qualifier for electromagnetic shocks.

In the event that on this day I should spill my guts to the one who tainted it, don’t put me in a coffin because that would be an insult to me.

I want exposure. Should I decay, leave me be in my disintegration because all I have done is give excuses for the very innocent parts that I control but mostly because I finally have what I need that I didn’t really give thought to wanting since my wanting wanted something else that would have caused massive destruction and made me deny my birthright.

MiniMe is back and she decided to make her entry quite “grand”!

Advertisements

CAUTIONARY ADVICE: if you’ve had a bad day, do not read this. Depending on how emotional you are, this writeup might be depressing for you and might make your day worse. Come back some other time if you wish.

Today was a sad day for many. A terrorist attack at a café in Sydney, Australia, left two dead including the gunman. I hate speaking about tragic events because it just makes me sad and downcast. But I have to because, so many people take a lot of things for granted while others are aware but choose not to SEE because they cannot face the truth. And the truth to many is brutal; one thing about it is that it may piss you off at first but it will set you free.

cropped-img_0709.jpg Life is an endless circle. Generations come and go, but the earth lasts forever. The sun rises, and the sun sets, and then it rushes back to the place where it will rise again. The wind blows toward the south and shifts toward the north. Round and round it blows. It blows in a full circle. All streams flow into the sea but the sea is never full. The water finds it way back to the place where the streams began in order to start flowing again.

Whatever has happened before will happen again. Whatever has been done before will be done again.

People always say the world will be better and life will be good. In my own opinion, the world was, is and will always be “better”. Life IS good. Some of us fail to realise, that everything happening on earth took place before. There is nothing new under the sun.

People killed each other before; they stole and committed all sorts of crimes. When World War One occurred, victims and witnesses thought that was the end. Those of us that weren’t born yet only have archive footages and books. But we will never understand or feel the terror of those that witnessed it. That is why we think everything that is happening today is worse than events of past times.

I see everything as pointless. Everything turns out the same way for everyone. All people will share the same destiny, whether they are good or bad. And that thing is death. But I know that people who are alive have more hope than those that are dead. All of us who live know that we will die but the dead know nothing. They are gone forever. What reward is there for them? The memory of them will fade and they can’t take part in anything that happens on earth.

So what do I say for us who are all alive?

  1.  Enjoy life with those we love. This is what we get for our hard work
  2. Whatever presents itself for us to do, do it with all of our might because there is no knowledge, planning or skill in the grave where we’re all going

The two people that died today probably woke up thinking “o! Another beautiful day or stressful day!” It is also possible that they were not satisfied, happy, contented or at peace with themselves. They might have been planning on doing something, all the while postponing or procrastinating.

Even if people may live for many years, they should enjoy every one of them while remembering that there will be many dark days. Live boldly making sure that you put wisdom first. The clock is ticking and everyday we age.

Nothing is new. Nothing from the past is remembered. A Quote by Aristotle:

Remember that time slurs over everything, let all deeds fade, blurs all writings and kills all memories. Exempt are only those which dig into the hearts of men by love.

And in the future, those who come after us will remember nothing.

Let us remember those who were affected in today’s attack and all those who are suffering presently. It could or can be one of us. All we have is time and no one knows when it will stop ticking for us. Enjoy life; don’t die sad and miserable.

If you are thinking “o I am too old”, stop. You are never too old to do anything. You might look in the mirror and see wrinkles, sagged skin and baggy eyes but know that age is in the heart. If you feel old you will act old but if you feel young at heart you will act young. It is all about perception.

REFERENCE: The book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible.

You might not be religious but it is not wrong to study. The Bible is also a book.

Bitter Little Lies

Posted: December 12, 2014 in The Daily Post
Tags: , , , ,

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Sweet Little Lies.”

Lying is bad. It causes distrust among each and everyone of us and that is why most of the time when people say things to us we need convincing. Some might say that lying is best, when you want to spare someone’s feelings but they never look at the end result.

If the person whose feelings were spared finds out eventually (they always do),  the whole issue will turn into something entirely different… Something it wasn’t meant to become in the first place.

Lies are lies

I don’t believe in White lies… I never will. To be sincere, I have lied several times and it has caused huge problems for me. Most times, when I lie, I find myself telling the truth minutes later because nothing says uncomfortable like a conscience singing mantras.

So this is where I stopped earlier. After thinking long and hard I have decided to re-edit. I have never been put in a situation where lying was really necessary. After reading a post from the blog below:

http://lindaswritingblog.wordpress.com/2014/12/12/sometimes-a-lie-is-kind/

I have decided that if put in a similar situation I’d do the exact same thing. Like Sammy Silva said in the commenting area – lying is human nature. So adieu to the “I don’t believe in white lies” line.