Just Wanted To Say…

via KILL OR BE KILLED OR DIE RUNNING

I’m still ALIIIIVVVE!! Thank God!

Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

DEAR X-FRIEND

 

Photo by Johannes Plenio on Pexels.com

I am sorry I told you and only you my secrets,

I am sorry I was selfless towards you,

I am sorry I put you before others,

I am sorry I that you were the most important person to me outside my family,

I am sorry I always understood you,

I am sorry I always stood up for you,

I am sorry to have made a difference in your life,

I am sorry I made you a stronger person than you were,

I am sorry I gave you reasons to never hate me…until now.

THE ENEMY WITHIN ME

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer”…

The enemy is already close!

In fact, it is within me,

The enemy within me always has a voice,

Constantly judging, questioning, doubting,

It never stops telling me how untalented I am,

How I will never achieve my goals because of that never-ending ticking,

How insignificant I am among the multitudes,

How unlucky I am because of my birthplace,

How unattractive I am because of my spots.

When bad habits surface, it is conveniently positive.

It finally gives me space and room to breathe

So much so that I want to always be in that place,

A place that might seal  my…no…that WILL seal my fate.

The enemy within me…

Is that enemy really within me or is the enemy me?

Rhetorical…

It is obvious what the answer to that is.

 

I AM WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY COUNTRY

After writing yesterday’s post I felt overwhelming guilt. I could not place why I felt so heavy…It’s very eerie that today’s daily prompt is retrospective

Was it because I got myself thinking about things that made me unhappy? Did I get emotional? It finally dawned on me why…

I was born here, this is where I have a sense of identity. Here, I have had the best and the worst times! I got my first kiss here, I had my first black eye here, I got bullied here, I beat up a boy here (don’t re-read that)…My life is here. Even if I go somewhere else, I will never be as comfortable as I am here because this is my country.

Why should I then start to post negative things about here? Because I refuse to let go of these negative things I am part of the problem. Because I write about negative things on a site with readers from different parts of the world…I am MOST definitely part of the problem.

If you think I am being hard on myself…I’ve got proof

Yep! That says it all. I am done posting negative stuff. Lord knows I don’t need a trashy life! Nu-uh.

 

Reasons to Celebrate 2015

I celebrate 2015 because

• I am still alive and my loved ones have not been harmed despite all the bombs that went off near us
• There’s a roof over my head
• An endless supply of cloths
• I have the luxury of choosing whether to eat roasted chicken or grilled fish, sleep on my bed or the Sitting Room sofa, disturb the ants or go swimming, watch The Mentalist or RudeTube…
• My limbs are still in two’s
• My senses work perfectly
• I still have a mother to frown at and disturb
• I still have  a father to tease about the boys that stare
• I still have a grandmother and a grandfather; which means an endless supply of blessings and prayers
• The acne has refused to go and the cold is coming which means my body still functions perfectly.
• Some people don’t like me which means there is nothing wrong with me.

The list goes on.

Image from http://www.funnypica.com

My First Blog Award

I am pleased to receive this award not because of the praise but because it means that people actually take the time to read my words. I have been nominated by Sam Rappaz, a very talented blogger. And I don’t say this just because she nominated me but because I have thought this of her ever since I visited her blog.

Rules for the award

1.  Thank the person who nominated you and add a link to their blog
2.  Display the award on your post
3.  List the award rules so your nominees will know what to do
4. State 7 things about yourself
5. Nominate 15 other bloggers for the award
6. Contact your nominees to let them know you have nominated them. Provide a link to your post.
7. Proudly display the award logo (or buttons) on your blog, whether on your side bar, ABOUT page, or a  special page for awards

7 THINGS ABOUT ME

1.  I smile when I hear bad news. A very bad thing but completely involuntary.
2.  I tend to have an “avoid males syndrome”.  And I am as straight as they come so don’t get any      ideas in your pretty little heads.
3. I am very sorry if this will annoy anyone. I do not like Justin Bieber. And yes I am 100% female and a full fledged teenager.
4. Cooking and house chores!! ugh! I hate them but I have no choice but to do them, as it is a task females have to endure.
5. I have almost every genre of music. And I say MUSIC not NOISE. Yes! Most of today’s music is noise so I survive on the few good ones and my grandma’s and mother’s old  tapes.
6. My shoes don’t survive. I can’t walk in them. So I purchase rugged shoes and avoid designers.

MY NOMINEES

1. Eilihd at Journey Into The Mind of a Scottish Girl.
2. Granonine at Just writing.
3. Sammy Silva at The Heart Stories.
4. Little Monster Girl at LMG comic updates
5. ARK at Passionate Ambika
6. Karthik at C9 photography
7. Hardi at Fifty Shades of Reality
8. Chatty Rachel at Rachel Being Chatty
9. Ray Ferrer at Emotion on Canvas
10. IRTFY at I Refuse To Follow Your Blog
11. Aruna at Ripples and Reflections
12. Amelia’s Plum
13. Words Of Reckless Abandon
14. Chotisi at Chostisibaatein
15. From Where I Sit

Bloggers on the list above have very unique and beautiful blogs. Creativity, honesty, beauty, humour and all the other positive adjectives I can’t possibly remember now. There are also others that I would have put here but they’ve been nominated already; Nelkumi, SoulCPR, Livingonchi, Passion for Poetry etc. There are so many amazing bloggers in the blogosphere and I am happy I discovered you all!

Doing this really took most of my energy…PHEW!! Thank you again for nominating me Sam and allow me to borrow some of your words…

“The nominees I have listed NEED NOT DO ANYTHING if they so wished. I just wanted them to know that I am here, reading and looking over their blogs and that their work has meant something to me”

Happy New Year All!!

Ramblings

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Alphabet Soup.”

Write down the letters of the ABC. For each one, choose a word that begins with that letter. Now, write a post about anything — using all the words you’ve selected.

A am

B brain

C Cruise

D doing

E exhausted

F feet

G guitar

H hell

I i

J just

K kitchen

L laptop

M my

N no

o one

P popcorn

Q quadragesimarian

R ringing

S school

T tom

U underground

V ventricular

W watch

X xbox

Y yatch

Z zeppelin

Hell no!! Sorry guys… I am not doing this today. I just came back from school, my feet hurts, my head is ringing and my brain is exhausted. So I am going to the kitchen  to get a tiny bowl of popcorn, then boot my laptop and watch Tom Cruise travel back in time repeatedly in “Edge of Tomorrow”.

Hmm… I’ve use all the alphabets except Q, U, V, X, Y and Z. I guess I’ll have to cheat.

Zeppelin …as in guitar legend

Yatch... Must get me one of those

Xbox… You get the idea

Ventricular… Yeah, I know big words too.

Underground… Place that after “need for speed”…you know…the game

Quadragesimarian… It is really a word and I learnt it 3hrs ago.

MEMORIES FROM MY CHILDHOOD: #1 THE WEIRD FRUIT

I sat down on the steps of the bungalow knotting up the hair of my Barbie doll, although, at the time it looked like I was doing something beautiful. I chose that day to wear my favorite English dress.

My grandfather brought it all the way from England for me as a birthday present. It was white and had these little rosy petals on it. I never liked to wear dresses but this particular one was quite pretty.

I hummed the nursery ryhme “Twinkle, twinkle little star” while I worked. My mother was at work and my father was… somewhere. A noise however interrupted my little project. I looked up and saw my brother and his friends riding down the slope.

They stopped in front of the house. My brother climbed off his bicycle. After ruffling my hair, he went inside to drink some water. His friends came up to me and sat on the steps.

I saw them earlier so there was no need to exchange greetings. There was no need for formality since they were my friends as well. I never got along with the girls.

My brother came out of the house wiping his mouth with his sleeve. I looked up to him, “Where are you going next?” I asked.

I could stay alone for days and wouldn’t mind but this time I felt like doing something.

“We’re going to climb those rocks over there”.

I grinned. He looked down at me narrowing his eyes

“Miriam… no”

I gave him the little kitten look. His friends all tried to persuade him.

“You know mama won’t like that”

“How? She will”. I said in a soft voice.

“Are you going like that?”

I squealed in delight and looked down at my dress. I shrugged “Yes. The rocks aren’t so high”.

He nodded and I dropped my Barbie doll on a nearby chair.

I got my little bicycle and climbed. We rode to the rocks and parked.

The rocks were not so steep but my brother and his friends made a fuss over me. Ensuring that I was in front of them; helping me maintain my balance. It annoyed me a bit but they let me come with them and I had to take that into consideration.

We reached the top and we saw a tree. It was very healthy and not too tall. There were little creamy colored things hanging from it. They looked like peaches.

We all went to the tree and our friend plucked the fruit. It had little hairs on it and appeared succulent. The whole thing made my mouth water.  He spoke, “I think I know this fruit”. He opened it easily. It had a yellowish interior with little seeds in it. We all plucked ours and went through the same process. I popped one of the seeds into my mouth and sucked it.

It had a sweet and sour taste. I liked it and so did the others. We gathered some more and carried it back down the rock. I placed mine into the little basket in front of my bicycle.

As we rode back, I started to feel a little bit uncomfortable. My brother and his friends were unusually quiet. I blinked rapidly because the road was becoming blurry.

“I feel sick,” my brother said.

His friends were all scratching parts of their bodies. Suddenly, it hit me full force. It was like millions of needles were piercing my skin. I stopped riding and started to scratch my body. I didn’t know which part was itching me. My fingers were everywhere.

It felt like time stopped and I remember running fast. Really fast. Tom and Jerry FAST. At some point our friends disappeared one after the other and it was just my brother and I.

We pulled each other. It was suddenly crab mentality… king of the hill competition.

I had no idea why we were doing that until we got home. It was a race to the shower. We just wanted some relief and we didn’t care how we got it as long as the itching stopped.

My brother and I got to the bathroom. I entered it before he did but he pulled me out and turned on the shower. I started to cry and curse him.

I felt like crying, laughing and pulling out my hair all at once. I heard my brothers frantic scratching. Water was flying everywhere.

I saw the sink and I did something I never thought I’d do. I ripped my pretty, pretty, pretty dress off. Tore it to shreds. I turned on the faucet and threw water on my body. It just wasn’t enough. I cursed my brother… “I hate you!! I hate you!!! I wish you weren’t my brother! Bloody hell!!”. Got the last curse from Ron in the Harry potter movie.

We both turned that bathroom into a swimming pool. I got so frustrated that the adrenaline rush hit me. I shoved my brother out of the shower and stayed under it. The itching continued for hours, although the cold water toned it down a bit.

My mother… “sigh”. She dealt with us. That was no fruit. It was definitely not a fruit.

Dil Pakh

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Gone, But Not Forgotten.”

I don’t even know how to start.

Dil was so…..noisy! When I was trying to sleep she’d be squawking and that isn’t all. See that beak, it was sharp and she pretty much knew it was. She bit me with it! 😱 several times!

She’s certainly not forgotten.

A FILLER: NIGERIA’S STRENGTH (POEM)

She was born pure,

She grew beautifully and gracefully.

Her pulse, a steady rythm

She shone in all her glory.

 Then it came.

The plagues!

It shook her core

The corruption, our pollution

The violence, our vile nature

Took her innocence away

Rocked her foundation

She was loosing her strength

She cried from the pain

The loneliness

Her slain inhabitants

Her neighbours, whom she loves, crossed her borders

Abused her trust and

Killed her children

Her tears, a rainfall

Despite the dealt dead blows from her people and

those next to her

Their ungratefulness,

Their betrayal,

She still stands.

As the fury of adversity blows with such ferociousness,

She leans like a palm tree during a Hurricane storm

But she never gets uprooted

She is a warrior

She is fierce

She is a survivor

She is my hope

She is my future

My feet may leave her,

but one thing is for sure,

.

I will always find my way back to her shores

I AM PROUDLY NIGERIAN

 Many thanks to Passion through Poetry (movingtowardsthelight.com) for inspiring me. You made me discover a hidden talent.

PICTURES: Nigerianembassy.nu, Overafrica.org, theguardian.com, csmonitor.com, buzznigeria.com, nigerianprofessional.com, nytimes.com, telegraph.co.uk, angelabey.com.